Herschel Walker Claims Election Is outfitted Against Person with Smaller Votes

 Herschel Walker Claims Election Is outfitted Against Person with Smaller Votes

ATLANTA( The Borowitz Report) — Sounding an alarm on the day that Georgians head to the pates, the Democratic Senate seeker Herschel Walker claimed that the runoff election was outfitted against the person with smaller votes.

“ I cast my vote and I saw all of these election- type people in there behind these tables, ” Walker told journalists. “ They ’re going to count up all the votes and, shazam, whoever got further votes is the winner. How is that fair? ”

Walker said that he might not have run for the Senate had he known that the person with smaller votes would be declared the clunker. “ This whole process has opened a lot of eyes for me, ” he said. “ It’s like commodity out of communist Russia. ”

He added that the election system was innately broken because millions of people bounce, and “ no bone can count that high. ”

“ I can slightly count to ten on a good day, ” he said, before helpers hustled him down from the microphone and into a auto.

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